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To the girl I see at the gym everyday: Each day I walk up the steps to the cardio equipment at my gym, I hope that maybe you won’t be there. But, then again, I am relieved when I see you because I know you are still surviving. I see you. I see you wearing a sweatsuit to workout. Those baggy sweatpants that you have to tie at the waist to keep them in place. At some point in your past, they fit a completely different way. Your huge hooded sweatshirt drapes down your body as you go through the movements on the elliptical. IRead More →

gym-skinny-body-image

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Today I was at the gym doing my regular morning routine before two friends of mine showed up next to me to do a treadmill workout together. They pulled out their phones, clicked on an app, and went back and forth deciding which particular program they were going to choose. Out of curiosity, I asked what app they were using, and, at the same time, they offered the name. Intrigued, again, I basically invited myself to join them. After an intense and exhausting run, we were cooling down, chatting, and one thing led to another–the conversation shifted to the topic of: WEIGHT AND BODY. TheRead More →

Konheim Mandras - Seeing Your Loved One Suffer

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Sad. Frustrated.  Helpless. Painful. The common answers I was given when asking my loved ones how they felt when I was struggling with an eating disorder. The scary thing… I have been on the other side. Where I’ve watched first-hand someone battle this disease. The feedback I received was consistent in the way I felt when I tried helping someone I loved.  I tried to do everything to help. I was willing to do anything. To open their eyes, and yell at them to, “Snap out of it!” I wrote letters, sent emails, called incessantly, begged them to change, pleaded for them to take stepsRead More →

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I did it again. For the third time. And as much as it is what I dreamed of and wanted, I have to be honest… kids have a way of disrupting any rhythm or routine. So, for me, the fact that I have done this now three times is amazing.  Today I saw a young, glowing, and beautiful pregnant girl. You have to understand…my idea of young has evolved. Since having kids, I feel I have aged drastically. So a first time pregnant woman looks stunning compared to how I feel and how I feel I look. As I admired her and her adorable maternityRead More →

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You can be an amazing athlete. You can be an influential teacher. You can be a successful physician. You can be a great coach. You can be a very involved parent. You can get straight A’s in school. You can be the valedictorian of your class. You can be the CEO of a large company. You can be a man. You can be a woman. You can be an adult. You can be a child. …and it’s possible to still have an eating disorder. See, the misconception is that it is visibly apparent and obvious if someone is struggling with an eating disorder. People cannot imagineRead More →

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Be kind… For everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. My mom’s ongoing words my entire upbringing were, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” I never truly appreciated or understood the consequences words may have on someone until I battled and overcame anorexia. She played for Indiana University. She had matched up against me each time we had played, and this particular time was no different. I would like to give her the benefit of the doubt, and believe she was a nice person who just used the wrong language to talk smack. But,Read More →

Erin Konheim Blog Soccer

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As high school and college graduation pictures continue to appear on my newsfeed, I can’t help but reflect back to those exciting, yet terrifying times in my life. The exhilaration of being a senior, moving away from home, and establishing independence is remarkable. Parties, freedom, friends, and community celebrating for what seems like weeks. But, in due time, each student will begin packing and preparing for the next phase of life. An abrupt transition from confidence to uncertainty occurs, and anxiety subtly begins to set in. Regardless of one’s connection and relationship to home and family, moving out can be very scary and overwhelming. ForRead More →

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It was the first time in years that I was actually skinny and proportional. My once strong, muscular quad muscles dwindled down to skin and bones. I felt toned and cut, especially my abdomen, as it appeared I even had a six-pack. I loved trying on clothes, and seeing that even extra smalls were too big on me. But, mostly, I loved wearing a bathing suit. As illogical and completely unhealthy as these thoughts may be, even thirteen years after having an eating disorder, I still sometimes think about how I miss some aspects of that time period. I am completely aware that, though, IRead More →

Erin Konheim Mandras - What Not to Say to New Moms

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I did it. I said the worst thing anyone could have ever said to me after giving birth to a baby. Though I still like to believe my comment was excusable, it falls under the category of guilty when it comes to pregnancy and post-baby etiquette. As a woman who has gone through two pregnancies, I can’t help but notice other women who are pregnant. They always look so great to me, and seem to be glowing beautifully. So, I have watched a mom at my kids preschool through her entire pregnancy. Three weeks ago, I ran into her at my OBGYN appointment, and we hadRead More →

Michigan State Dream

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“Wow. I never knew any of that,” said an assistant coach of one of the men’s athletic teams at Michigan State University following my speech. This coach happened to be a contemporary of mine. One who I actually have known since I was twelve years old. As I looked at him, and smiled, I thought, “Well, of course you didn’t know any of it.” Until Kick The Scale became established and publicized, the thought of anyone knowing I suffered from a psychological or physical disorder was horrifying. Why would I have wanted anyone to know I struggled, or needed anti-depressant medication, or that I evenRead More →