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It only takes one moment, one second, one phrase to shatter a girl’s self-image, and take away her innocence forever. And, that defining moment can never ever be taken back as the damage has already been done. For me, that one moment was when I was told I needed to be more fit in order to perform at a higher level in my sport. I believed the only way to be more fit and faster was to lose weight. Before that moment, I never counted calories, looked at the nutrition facts panel, or “dieted.” In fact, none of those things ever even crossed my mind.Read More →

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To the girl I see at the gym everyday: Each day I walk up the steps to the cardio equipment at my gym, I hope that maybe you won’t be there. But, then again, I am relieved when I see you because I know you are still surviving. I see you. I see you wearing a sweatsuit to workout. Those baggy sweatpants that you have to tie at the waist to keep them in place. At some point in your past, they fit a completely different way. Your huge hooded sweatshirt drapes down your body as you go through the movements on the elliptical. IRead More →

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Some believe they have Gaydar, and are able to sense if a person is gay or straight. Some believe they have Jewdar, and can detect if one is Jewish. Me? I have Anodar, and I have the ability to recognize when someone is struggling with an eating disorder. After I ordered my dinner last night at a fast-food style restaurant, I made my way to the cashier to pay. The girl who took my credit card made eye contact, and our eyes locked for a split second. In that second, I wished I could say to her, “I see you. I know what you’re thinking,Read More →

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If a genie in a bottle asked me to make one wish, I would wish to have the ‘perfect’ body. The genie would then ask me to define the ‘perfect’ body. Without hesitation, I insist it’s a skinny and feminine body with just enough muscle and tone to add shape and definition. This includes a perfect proportions, lengthy legs, and must have a thigh gap.  The current media worships the skinny look. We are inundated by the ‘ideal’ body type everywhere we turn: mannequins, supermodels, actresses, TV personalities, Barbie, pageant contestants, and more. Born with a short stature and athletic build, I have had cripplingRead More →

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I can feel my body spreading. Literally, as I sit on the couch, I can see and notice that my legs are getting bigger by the second, and my stomach is expanding. All I can imagine is the number on the scale increasing and increasing each minute I am handcuffed and instructed not to do any physical activity. This includes: No exercise — meaning my body will not be releasing any endorphins contributing to my energy level and positive outlook on life. No lifting — that means not even my twelve-pound baby; therefore, I am being forced to have and hire help during this restrictive time. No bending up andRead More →