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It only takes one moment, one second, one phrase to shatter a girl’s self-image, and take away her innocence forever. And, that defining moment can never ever be taken back as the damage has already been done. For me, that one moment was when I was told I needed to be more fit in order to perform at a higher level in my sport. I believed the only way to be more fit and faster was to lose weight. Before that moment, I never counted calories, looked at the nutrition facts panel, or “dieted.” In fact, none of those things ever even crossed my mind.Read More →

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Growing up in Detroit, I was raised in what I considered one of the best sports towns in the country. During my childhood, it seemed as though winning championships came naturally. My love for Detroit sports started from the time I was a baby. To this day, when I tell someone from Michigan that I was born in 1984, their immediate response is, “The year the Tigers won the World Series!” Though the Tigers were a great team to root for, I quickly became an avid hockey fan. How could I not when the city was nicknamed “Hockeytown?” I was lucky enough to witness, arguably,Read More →

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When I set out that summer of college to prepare for my sophomore season of soccer, I never in my wildest dreams anticipated that I’d be diagnosed with an eating disorder just months later. This is the exact reason I publicized my story and am doing everything I can to share my experiences. The more eating disorders are talked about and explained, the more likely we will recognize and label what we are experiencing. Naming the problem helps us identify it, and then leads way to treatment. And, early intervention is essential in helping to prevent serious psychological and health consequences. Elite athletes have aRead More →

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It was a cold day, and all I wanted was a coffee and muffin from Dunkin’ Donuts. So, I parked my car, walked in, and scoped out all of my options. There was only one muffin that was labeled reduced fat, which to me at the time would be the only possibility. But, I needed to know more. So, I asked the girl how bad the muffin really was for me. She took out a binder with the nutritional information, and handed it to me. The second I saw the number of calories that were in that “reduced fat” muffin, I gasped. “No thank you,”Read More →

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It was just eight days ago that I spoke at the world’s largest gathering of soccer coaches. As I stood at the podium to present not just once, but twice, I so proudly and confidently discussed a serious issue within the sports world right now—an issue that has affected me, personally; in fact, it consumed my life during a particularly tumultuous time in college—at Michigan State University—and it nearly took my life. I had developed an eating disorder, anorexia nervosa to be specific— which has the highest mortality rate of any mental illness—as a student-athlete in East Lansing, Michigan. In 2003 I hit my rock bottom, and asRead More →

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First and foremost, I would like to personally thank each and every one of you who attended my presentations at the United Soccer Coaches Convention in Philadelphia. The topics of my sessions were “Aiming for a Positive Body Image,” and, “Pressures of Athletics can Lead to Eating Disorders.” Immediately following my second presentation, a woman came up to the stage, and loudly stated, “I just wanted to let you know. I wasn’t planning on coming, but last minute, my friend encouraged me to join her. I must say, this was the best presentation I have seen thus far. And, my only goal for next yearRead More →

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I had the pleasure of speaking to an entire sophomore class at a local high school the other day. As I stood at the podium watching each and every student walk through the entryway, I could feel the tension in the room increasing as they took their seats. They were informed of the topic that was going to be addressed—eating disorders and body image–issues that are far too misunderstood and unspoken, yet, so imperative. And, based on their attentiveness, questions, and discussion following my presentation, it was clear these students were more than familiar with these happenings. Our family, friends, and community learned of this speaking engagementRead More →

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My last collegiate soccer game was in November 2006 against Notre Dame in the NCAA tournament. Eleven years seems like a long time (and, it is), but my memories of playing college soccer are just as clear and vivid as they were then. While watching college games this fall, I could not help but picture myself out on the field…dressed in uniform…crossing balls…high-fiving my teammates…acknowledging a great pass…and leading by example. But, there was definitely one thing I could not picture. And, unfortunately, it goes back to the body image and eating disorders epidemic occurring in society today. Just as styles and trends in clothingRead More →

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You have to be kidding. This has to be some sort of joke, right? Or maybe someone dreamt this happened, and shared it to the point the story made national headlines—but, in fact, it didn’t actually happen. That is me dreaming, I suppose. On Friday, President Donald Trump met with children of the White House press corps so they could trick or treat in the Oval Office. While handing out candy to the children, Trump said, “You have no weight problems ― that’s the good news, right?” As a child, I recall salivating over a piece of cheesecake—my favorite dessert of all-time—following a steak dinner.Read More →

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Pants have never been my thing. But, obviously, due to social standards, I wear them. When I look in the mirror, I see something very different than what most see. A girl referred to me as “tiny” the other day, and the only thought that went through my head was, “I wish.”  I was just wandering through a boutique today actually, and as I checked out the mannequin wearing a swimsuit, analyzed every curve, or lack thereof, and feature of its body. I saw perfection. Her inner thighs didn’t touch, she had long, skinny legs, and the flattest stomach that would even be possible. I,Read More →